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YOUR TEAMMATES - Junior Hockey News

Published: Tuesday, 29 Jan 2013
By: Steve Pronger

Last week I shared with you my thoughts on the concept of game day skates and the ritual of test driving cars. The idea of comparing men's inability to accept and digest what's good for us to test driving cars, came to me as I pondered the incredible amount of vehicle choices and options that presented themselves at the recent Detroit Auto Show. The thought of comparing mental digestive inability to loving game day skates came from running too many game day skates. Because of this year's show, I now know that before you test drive anything you are going to want to look under the hood. The suggestion I was given was that you should wait and do this at a local dealer's showroom. There you probably won't have to ask a pretty spokes model to move.

As you read this column each week you will learn that these little rituals are some of the kinda things that men will do, to outwardly seem like they are doing the next right thing. Here's another beauty. Like the need to have a morning glory skate, I've seen guys flipping lawn mowers over in the hardware store before they make the big purchase. Hockey players would appreciate "it's all about the blade".

By doing certain things every time at a certain time, like flipping a lawn mower or leaving your hockey stick in the same spot each time you enter the dressing room, men have learned to convince ourselves that all is ok - I have order, I have routine. I have a way of doing things. Performing ritualistic tasks like packing your equipment the same way in the duffle bag or if you're talented enough, in your stall, proves to all you have order. These rituals, along with sitting in the same spot on the bus will again, make you feel like you're still number 1, despite the tough loss to the last place team.

But let me ask you this. Why are men compelled to perform these types of seemingly useless rituals?  Who's making us put the stick in the same spot each time, have a morning glory skate and flip the lawnmower? Why do we do all the routine things that make us feel numero uno?  Men - the answer is your brain and it is out to screw you.

Through these articles I am going to tell you things your brain won't. I am going to tell you about your brain and really how it functions or not. Men are at the point where we really need to know who our mental teammates are and that they have been trashing our locker rooms and hiding our sticks. Hell, these guys are even peeling off the tape, wetting it and sticking it in your gloves.

Every man's brain has two sections, plus all the grey stuff. The amount of grey stuff is in dispute but what I do know it's a little more for teenage girls who play hockey and a little less for teenage boys who play hockey (more on that later). The first section is what I call the IN YOUR FACE MIND or outer mind. The second section is what I will refer to as your MAN CAVE MIND or inner mind.  

It's in these two brain sections is where we find those mental teammates who have been sleeping on your couch, emptying your fridge and not paying billet fees.  And how have they getting away with that? Next week we'll pop the hood and have a look.

NEXT WEEKS PRACTICE - "Getting In Your Face"

Status: Thinking it's practical.

 Steve Pronger's blog COACH H.I.M. publishing "Your Brain Is Out To Screw You" - The Men's Guide To Doing The Next Right Thing, can be found at: coachhimstevepronger.blogspot.ca

Follow on Facebook at Coach HIM.


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* Article disclaimer: This site may contain advice, opinions and statements from various authors and information providers. Views expressed in this article reflect the personal opinion of the author, Steve Pronger, and not necessarily the views of JuniorHockey.com. JuniorHockey.com does not represent or endorse the accuracy or reliability of any advice, opinion, statement or other info provided in the article, or from any other member of this site.

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