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Last week I talked
about the allegory of riding an elephant to describe conscious and unconscious
changes for a hockey player. The rider is in control of their performance just as
long as the elephant wants to do the work. When the elephant decides it wants
to play in the waterfall, the rider takes a bath. So the first part of making a
change in your behavior is learning to be a good elephant rider. So this is
what needs to happen:
I.
Direct the Rider: (Cognitive Behavioral
Techniques)
Understand your thoughts (Cognition) play an
important role in what you do in relations to performance. How you talk to
yourself is very important. Are you positive or negative in what you tell
yourself?
- Find the bright spots (Id Positive and Negative Thoughts)
One thing that few of us understand is that we are often very
negative with ourselves. One exercise I use with
my clients is called bragging rights. The first thing we do is I ask them to tell me the good
things that went on the past week in practice,
games and life. They are not permitted to say anything about the things that didn't work
out. This is because we here it all of the time when we talk to ourselves. We
are so conditioned to not brag. Well if we aren't going to acknowledge
the good things that went on, then who will?
After that the client
can identify what went wrong during the week. This is all part of the process of
learning to identify negative thoughts.
- Script the critical moves (Planning)
The next step is scripting. Like writing a
screenplay for a movie only this is the movie of your life in sports. What
is the plot? Even more important, what is the actors
motivation, their purpose or Why? When you have an idea of how the movie I going to
be filmed, you can work out the details. No screenplay is 100% like the
movie. Changes are always made, but without the script the actors don't know their lines. You
never know if it's a good movie or not, because the actors (you) are
saying random lines. But with a script you have direction. Clarifying direction is the
next step.
- Point to the destination (Goal Setting)
Goals- Roadmap to our Dreams
Goal
Setting Done Right
In truth,
I am tired of talking or hearing about goal setting. Everywhere I go and everything I read is on goal setting. I am asked to talk
about it, teach it and preach
it. Some believe that it is the most important contribution you can have towards success.
And don't get me started about SMART goals. Okay, so maybe it's a good place to get
started. But I had to share that while goals are important, goals are one
part of the larger formula, just so you understand where I come from.
SMART GOALS
Specific, Measurable, Action-based, Research-based, and Time-bound
- S ____________________________
- M ____________________________
- A
____________________________
- R
_____________________________
- T
_____________________________
Okay, so SMART GOALS do
make sense, so I won't throw them out as they are useful,
but then again it is not the whole story. SMART Goals are best practices and what
most everyone teaches. I'll tell you a secret about goals setting that works
almost like magic another time. Or you can cheat and order a copy of The Athlete within
You.
Back to our elephant
rider. Good riders understand how to take control. So in understanding your
thoughts you can put the elephant to work.
Now we just need to persuade the beast that work is good for them. NEXT
TIME: II. Motivate the Elephant: (Understand your Why- *AMP UP)
If you would
like to understand Emotional Intelligence better, more information about the
ESi can be found at the link below. Cost of the ESi is $99 and includes a full
report. A bonus I'm offering is if someone takes the ESi via my link, I will do
a 15-20 minute debriefing with the athlete, at no additional charge via SKYPE
or phone. Take the ESi Now. http://bit.ly/AumKFL
Athletes
from all over the country have been seeking out Mike Margolies for close to
thirty-five years for his expertise in helping them live up to their potential.
They have sought his counsel and unique teaching style to learn about the game
within the game. Mike founded Sport Psychology Consultants in 1983 and has
helped over 2000 athletes. Mike has taught at four Universities and completed
research at the United States Olympic Training Center. Mike Margolies is available
for workshops, team and individual consultation, assessment and as a speaker.
His new book is called "The Athlete within You- a mental approach to
sports and business" http://themental-game.com/.
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